Perhaps 100 years ago, living up to 50 was considered a huge blessing as disease, accidents and hardship are everyday risks. In my home country, the average life expectancy in 2007 was about 77/78. 16 years later, it is now 83/84 today, an increase of 6 more years. I believe that when I hit 77 in 20 years, the average mortality rate could reach 90/100 as medical advancement accelerates.
Having good DNA helps too and my parents are currently 89/94 respectively. So barring any unfortunate circumstances, I would have a high probability of living longer. I am therefore just at my halftime mark and looking at the 2nd phase of my life now. There could be a long way ahead.
Financially, I would have to ensure that we will have enough to last that long. Hopefully, the kids can pitch in if they need to. But we have calculated that it should be alright and we will be the last sandwich generation to have to take care of both parents and kids.
Old age is inevitable. We have to make the best of a deteriorating situation where the body and mind weaken. Medical advancement is picking up and we should see some perennial diseases like cancer and dementia being resolved in the next 5-10 years.
My parents have always been my role models to age well. Mum was a housewife all her life and the pillar of the family, making tough decisions given the limited resources she had. Dad was the main breadwinner for our 5 siblings and grandmother. He was the stern no-nonsense one who had to put food on the table. He retired in the early 1990s right after I completed my uni, being the last in the family to finish my studies.
Over the last few years during Covid till now. I have seen changes in both of them which worries us. Mum is getting more forgetful and does not remember names as her short-term memory deteriorates. She is less sure of herself and not the confident person she once was. Her legs are getting weaker and she now needs a metal rod support to walk slowly.
Dad has always been a perfectionist and does everything meticulously. Yet he looks frail now and needs constant rest and stops frequently to power up during a regular walk to buy groceries. I sense his stress on having not only to take care of himself but also to keep an eye out for mum.
We are trying to get Mum to see a specialist to slow down her dementia and provide guidance for us to care for her daily needs. They have been living alone for a while and plans are now in place to try to hire a full-time helper to watch over them.
We are moving to another phase of life and will have to make some necessary choices on their behalf to ensure that they have a comfortable and safe environment with fewer worries. It will be our duty as their children to give back the love they have showered on us for all these years. My dinner with them this week was a reminder to me again that we need to do what is best for them now.
Just to date this blog, there were 2 events to highlight this week. The first relates to Elon Musk. He started the week by stirring up a shit storm with his supposedly anti-semitic comments on X. He also told the advertisers who withdrew from his X platform to go screw themselves LOL.
Then to walk back on his comments, he visited Israel to witness the atrocities of the 07 Oct massacre and condemned Hamas. He tried to explain that his tweet was aimed at Jews who supported Hamas and that made no sense to him. But the damage was already done.
He topped off the week by introducing his new Cybertruck which generally had great reviews even as the price was much higher than he previously promised. Such is the workings of the complicated mind of the richest man on earth. Reading Walter Isaacson’s book on Elon should give me a better psychoanalysis of the man. What a busy week for him!
Finally, we had the evolving Gaza situation. About 100+ hostages were returned to Israel in exchange for Palestinian prisoners over 1 week of ceasefire. Then talks broke down and it went back to the Israel mission to eradicate Hamas.
I find it ironic that an enemy can come to your village to rape and kill your family members and take hostages. Then when you try to save your people and exact revenge on them, they use the hostages as bargaining chips to survive while using their people as human shields.
Hamas had crossed the line to become the ultimate ISIS terrorist which does not leave room for more negotiation even as they hold the remaining hostages close to them. It is lunacy to think that Israel will let them go after they pretended to lean towards peace talks for 2 years before launching the horrific attacks on 07 Oct.
The last month of the year has started. December is traditionally a festive period to chill and go for holidays. I will try to enjoy it even as I have so many work-related things on my mind to prepare for the new year. Wishing everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year ahead!
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